Dragon’s Dogma 2 isn’t all about its breathtaking landscapes, fire-breathing dragons, terrifying monsters, magical spells or the epic background music it boasts proudly – the side quests are also gaining popularity amongst the players of this impressive RPG, and one such quest is A Beggar’s Tale. Here’s our review of A Beggar’s Tale quest from Dragons Dogma 2.
Brace yourself because this review is going to be brutally honest, both in terms of the good and the bad. Tighten your seat belts, it’s going to be a long ride with a lot of turbulence.
Dragons Dogma 2 A Beggar’s Tale Quest Review
The entire objective of A Beggar’s Tale quest is to patiently wait in front of the Vernworth statue and listen to the tale of Albert, a beggar who tells his tale to entertain people and earn a few coins to treat himself to a glass of ale. After listening to Albert’s nonsense, you have to follow him to his house, and steal his garb after he leaves. After stealing his garb, you have three options – the first option is to sell the garb back to Albert for which he will give you gold coins to hide his secret, the second & third option is to give his garb back to his 1st or 2nd wife i.e. Hilda and Celina.
Both the choices with Hilda and Celina will end up in you getting gold after selling the garb, but the option with Celina ends up with Albert getting killed. The whole point of A Beggar’s Tale is that you get to know about Albert’s secret i.e. he lives a dual life of being a beggar and a nobleman and it was the nobleman’s clothes which you stole to blackmail him.
So, you’re blackmailing a poor man who’s screaming his lungs out for a coin or two to make ends meet – you should be proud of yourself for wasting your time in completing the dumbest quest ever made. You have to wait for an eternity for Albert to stop talking and walk back to his house and wait for another year to leave the house so that you can steal his nobleman’s garb – it’s like learning to dance for a few months for your prom night only to learn that your date has ditched you for a handsome bully with social charisma.
You will complete the beggar’s tale, feel empty on the inside, and ask yourself “What am I doing with my life” – “Why does the task of stealing someone’s clothes and selling them back to them feel like the epitome of entertainment and inexplicable coolness to me“, you will ask this question to yourself a few times after completing this pointless quest.
The good thing about A Beggar’s Tale is you get to know the cunning side of a seemingly ordinary & underprivileged man – it’s similar to the guilty pleasure of knowing your male friend’s deepest darkest insecurities and pointing them out in front of his crush to embarass him, the juvenile pleasure of seeing your friend begging you through his eyes to stop revealing his secrets is a great feeling that everyone one of us has experienced in some shape or form.
Seeing Albert request to not reveal his dual life gives you a sort of authority over him – you feel powerful in a virtual world and it feels nice, unlike the real world where your boss just walks all over you in front of everyone. A bit of selfish psychological fun is harmless as long as it doesn’t translate to you bullying or blackmailing someone in real life. A Beggar’s tale lets the scared inner child in you break some rules and experience some sort of dominance that you never did in real life – it’s like having a gangster alter-ego who just does whatever he/she pleases.
Overall, the beggar’s tale quest from Dragons Dogma 2 is a brainless, dumb quest that will make you question your life choices – it’s like an IQ-reducing machine.
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